08 ☕ Voice + Spam
Sep. 11th, 2012 08:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
psychic_hotline[Avengers Filter]
Okay, so. Apparently I need to make something clear.
My name's Sara Pezzini. I'm Loki's Warden. I'm not going to quote Webster, but what that means in practice is that if you have a problem with him or if he tries to pull any shit on any of you, you come to me. He says a single word to you, get it fact-checked. Quietly.
And let me be clear: I don't care about reasonable self-defense in the face of an immediate physical threat. I do care about vendettas and pre-emptive strikes and bullying for the sake of it. And I really care about mugging a paraplegic so you can use parts from his wheelchair to attack my Inmate for talking.
[Loooong breath.]
I know none of you are going to like this, but the fact is that he has exactly the same right to be here that any other Inmate has. You can't just beat him up until he stops being a problem and you can't threaten him until he disappears - the opposite is true. I cannot say this clearly enough: he thrives on your attention. Even if I was prepared to let you, you cannot hurt him badly enough to make the fact you even bothered not worth it as far as he's concerned. Watching you guys fight among yourselves is like porn to him. Another couple of days like yesterday? You might as well just draw short straws to see who gets to go jerk him off, because I guarantee that's the level of satisfaction he's getting out of this.
If you can't deal with him being here, then don't. Just take a step back and get on with your lives and ignore him.
And learn to use filters.
[Open Pub Spam]
[Sara's incapable of getting drunk, these days. Not that she's ever been a heavy drinker - she went from being a violent but sober child to an almost obsessively responsible adult with no transitional period - but since acquiring the Witchblade she's noticed her alcohol tolerance stretch and stretch until you could call it an immunity. Apparently the same crazy magic bullshit that lets her shrug off bullet wounds and walk away from skyscraper-height falls is also not letting her poison herself. Pain in the ass. It forced her to quit smoking, too.
Still, after drinking five whiskeys like they're water she realises that a) there's no-one around to put up a front for and b) if she's drinking for the taste she might as well drink something she likes the taste of. So now she's sitting at a corner table, nursing a Cosmo and trying not to brood.
Some slight brooding is occurring nonetheless.]
Okay, so. Apparently I need to make something clear.
My name's Sara Pezzini. I'm Loki's Warden. I'm not going to quote Webster, but what that means in practice is that if you have a problem with him or if he tries to pull any shit on any of you, you come to me. He says a single word to you, get it fact-checked. Quietly.
And let me be clear: I don't care about reasonable self-defense in the face of an immediate physical threat. I do care about vendettas and pre-emptive strikes and bullying for the sake of it. And I really care about mugging a paraplegic so you can use parts from his wheelchair to attack my Inmate for talking.
[Loooong breath.]
I know none of you are going to like this, but the fact is that he has exactly the same right to be here that any other Inmate has. You can't just beat him up until he stops being a problem and you can't threaten him until he disappears - the opposite is true. I cannot say this clearly enough: he thrives on your attention. Even if I was prepared to let you, you cannot hurt him badly enough to make the fact you even bothered not worth it as far as he's concerned. Watching you guys fight among yourselves is like porn to him. Another couple of days like yesterday? You might as well just draw short straws to see who gets to go jerk him off, because I guarantee that's the level of satisfaction he's getting out of this.
If you can't deal with him being here, then don't. Just take a step back and get on with your lives and ignore him.
And learn to use filters.
[Open Pub Spam]
[Sara's incapable of getting drunk, these days. Not that she's ever been a heavy drinker - she went from being a violent but sober child to an almost obsessively responsible adult with no transitional period - but since acquiring the Witchblade she's noticed her alcohol tolerance stretch and stretch until you could call it an immunity. Apparently the same crazy magic bullshit that lets her shrug off bullet wounds and walk away from skyscraper-height falls is also not letting her poison herself. Pain in the ass. It forced her to quit smoking, too.
Still, after drinking five whiskeys like they're water she realises that a) there's no-one around to put up a front for and b) if she's drinking for the taste she might as well drink something she likes the taste of. So now she's sitting at a corner table, nursing a Cosmo and trying not to brood.
Some slight brooding is occurring nonetheless.]
[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 08:29 pm (UTC)Dick doesn't spend a lot of time in the pub. Or, like, any time in the pub, really, because he's not a drinker and on top of that is an incredible light weight, but, well, you weren't in any of your usual hideouts and so the pub had seemed like a more likely spot than the lab or something to find you. And apparently it was.]
You know, your face can get stuck like that, if you're not careful. Everyone assumes it's just a thing to get kids to stop pouting, but you should see Bruce. [He slides into the seat next to her, folding his arms on the table and looking at her seriously.] What's up?
[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 08:54 pm (UTC)[She groans and tips her head back.]
Oh, God. I just called Captain America an asshole.
[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 08:56 pm (UTC)What happened?
[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:07 pm (UTC)[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:09 pm (UTC)Okay he and Slade used to fight all the time, maybe he wasn't a good person to have this kind of talk.]
Are you okay?
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:23 pm (UTC)[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:26 pm (UTC)Yeah, I'm fine. Nothing actually happened, as far as I can tell Stark was too drunk to follow through and Rogers either got distracted or remembered he had some ethics. [She sips at her amazingly pink cocktail.] Shit, I don't know. It's not like there're some people who I'd want to do nothing more than kick their asses every day they were here, but I'd at least wait for them to throw the first punch.
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:29 pm (UTC)[Visual aids: USEFUL DETERRENTS.]
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:36 pm (UTC)[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:40 pm (UTC)Thanks. Appreciate it.
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:42 pm (UTC)Do you mind if I ask you a question, Sara?
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:43 pm (UTC)[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:46 pm (UTC)[It's a thing she doesn't actually want to know, but willful ignorance has never been a big thing with her.]
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:50 pm (UTC)You get a mention in his biography, yeah.
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 09:55 pm (UTC)I've gathered he doesn't like me. [And Steve wouldn't exactly give her specifics, so.] Besides the obvious 'trickster god' bullshit - do I have anything to worry about?
[avengers + sara filter/text]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:00 pm (UTC)for the record
because the record is key, here
and i mean i just want to say that this is all not my fault its the fault of. well. just about everyone else. aside from natasha. hi, natasha, sweetheart, haven't talked to you since the shit hit the fan. if there is even a fan. is there a fan? because if not i can build one when im not, you know, in the barge equivalent of a padded cell.
by the way, pretty sure loki should be in here instead of reading poetry. why did you give him poetry? you should be literally stripped of wardenhood for helping him be even more obnoxious. oh but. not in here with me. id end up skinned alive or something because sorry but. youre stuck with the guy who chucked me out of a ninety story building just because i pointed out he has performance issues just like every other midgardian peasant.
lets look at the facts here for a moment okay?
number one...
okay, facts are overrated.
point of this.
ftr
for the record
reiteration, just for you capsaicin
i did not mug speed wheeler
i intended on borrowing a part from his chair to make a punch from me a little more effective because i know for a f a c t
fact
f a c t
emphasis.
... shit.
i know for a fact. f a c t. that asgardians are thicker skinned than humans. ive punched one in the face fully suited up without even breaking the skin.
also pretty sure having sex with a human would be the ultimate punishment for him so don't tempt me.
no.
wait.
that came out wrong.
the point.
because fuck i had a point.
keep him from trying to start shit and shit wont get started.
[.... he should really know better than to try to respond to anything while going through heavy alcohol withdrawal.
And yet? Well. Here he is.]
[avengers + sara filter]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:09 pm (UTC)[Spam]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:10 pm (UTC)And Dick... really, really doesn't have room to judge on that front because, well. He'd sort of pounced Slade after admittedly being provoked but.]
I just think it's ridiculous he thinks putting people like that together in close quarters is going to be anything short of a disaster. How are they supposed to focus on getting out of here or doing their jobs if someone they've got a really personal vendetta against is here, too?
[avengers + sara filter]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:11 pm (UTC)im not making you toys anymore.
[Life is a crappy, crappy thing :c]
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:13 pm (UTC)I'm not going to say any of you are safe from Loki. Hell, I'm not going to say anyone on the Barge period is safe from Loki. But if he's got it in for you specifically, it's because you outmanoeuvred him and he's got some hurt pride to make up for.
[avengers + sara filter]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:13 pm (UTC)[Private]
What's wrong with you? [Are you dying B|]
[Private]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:15 pm (UTC)I can deal with that. [Hurt pride is the same in everyone as far as she's concerned.] Thanks.
[private]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:16 pm (UTC)drinking for three weeks
to literally .2 away from alcohol poisoning
to absolutely nothing in your system
at all
even painkillers
because
i found your next torture routine
i guarantee people will talk
guar.
an.
tee.
[avengers + sara filter/voice]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:18 pm (UTC)Hope you don't take offense at me shelving this conversation until I don't have to talk over your withdrawal symptoms.
[avengers + sara filter/text]
Date: 2012-09-11 10:21 pm (UTC)but hey.
whatever you want.
[He'll... message you in a day or so saying he's an asshole. Don't worry, Sara.]